Not at once mind you, either. Back to back. Skylar had a tummy bug for four days, then instantly had a throat virus for two days right after. Now, because this is just the rule, Chase has started down that evil path.
I know a few moms that prefer to have one sick kid at a time. I'm not one of them. I like to just get it all out of the way. It's way easier to snuggle with two sick kids at once than to have one sick kid snuggling while the other throws a fit because they can't.
Over the past week, several thoughts have run through my head. And I'm sure we've all had them at some point while our kids are sick.
I've just decided to be vocal about it.
- What do you mean your tummy hurts? Do you mean you have to poop, are you hungry, or are you about to throw up? Because poop is fixable. Being hungry is fixable. Puking is fixable, but by your dad.
- Why don't kids come pre-programmed to throw-up in the toilet? Seriously?! This would make life soooo much easier if they just were built with a puking homing beacon. I would save a fortune in detergent.
- The unsick child must maintain a 6 foot radius of sick child at all times. If you're not going to be sick at the same time, I will try everything in my power to make sure the other doesn't get sick. I will quarantine myself with sick child if necessary.
- Please don't puke on me please don't puke on me please don't puke on.... damnit. Need I say more on that one?
- Can we keep the puking on me down to twice a day? It's just wrong how far my standards are falling.
- Where is your dad? He conveniently seems to disappear around the time the kids get sick. And I can't seem to find him until after I've done all the clean up and snuggles need to be dished out.
- Yay! Awesome! I didn't get puked on for over 24 hours! Same outfit all--- DAMNIT! THE OTHER ONE IS SICK NOW?! Actually happened. It happened Monday morning. I almost cried. I got teary eyed while changing out of my yoga pants and putting them in the washer. Mostly because I was almost done with laundry. I had to start all over.
- I have to start laundry all over. Shoot. Me. Now.
- I got puked on three times today? Screw it. Close enough. Standards are so low...